I am pretty sure my parents were trying to kill me.

I am pretty sure my parents were trying to kill us as children. I was going to say, ‘me,’ instead of, ‘us,’ then remembered that I have two older sisters. I sort of block them out of most of my childhood memories.

Because most of those memories consist of things like…. them making up mean songs…. with hand clap routines to go with the lyrics — like in ‘Miss Mary Mack.’

Anywhoo, here is proof that my parents tried to kill us:

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